Merry Christmas (?!?!)

"Oh, give me a noose I can hang from the tree
I need no excuse to end my misery
This holiday season
Is all the more reason to die
Oh, pull up a stool and inhere to a fool
Once found in solace and the season of yule
This holiday season
Is all the more reason to cry
I put on my mittens, one green and one red
And I walk alone where the bury the dead
The snow falls as I grieve
“It’s a gothic death rock christmas eve.”
The bottle is empty, the sleigh has a flat
The stripper in my bed is ugly and fat
Her tassels are tangled, and what’s worse?
My jingle won't jangle
This time of the year makes me sick to my guts
All this good cheer is a pain in the nuts
When it’s your career to be down in the dumps
Tidings of comfort and joy really suck
I feel like saint Nicholas is pulling my leg
This thing we call christmas is a sorry black plague
This holiday season
Is all the more reason to die!!!"

Christmas Sucks by Tom Waits & Peter Murphy